You asked me for my Consent
and I knew yes was assumed
My gut told me to dissent
either way i’m doomed
Standing over me, you wait
what must my answer be?
in your hands is my fate
You watch expectantly.
I feel powerless as you insist
Afraid and confused by your persistance
my gut is knotted in a twist
With it’s instinctual resistance.
If I say No, what will result?
I ask with meek concern,
Your answer feels like an assault
If a Yes I spurn
Yet still my gut is warning me
Suggesting another choice
But as you wait, I am not free
I feel without voice
With consent in the spotlight
My response is to freeze
I can not flee , I can not fight
So I try to appease.
Now let us re-imagine this disempowered scene
What if instead of consent, Informed Decision Making had been?
Being asking your opinion, which is valued and paramount
In fact the choice is all yours, and the only one to count.
You’ve time and space to consider things, and to be fully informed
And once you reach your conclusion, confidence is spawned.
The way that this can happen, is by thinking in advance
Not by going with the flow, and leaving it to chance.
Decisions made you’ll never use are better than none at all
If none you have, then you can’t, make an informed call.
Catherine Bell is the author of The Birth Map: boldly going where no birth plan has gone before. A Birth Map is an Advanced healthcare directive for birth.
Informed. Supported. Confident.
Find out more at Bellabirth.org, The Home of Informed Birth Preparation